Before…
This picture was taken when I was at my jovial worst! 358 pounds of fun and frivolity! I was huge! To quote Larry the Cable Guy, “They had to hire a rodeo clown to distract me when they brought the groceries home!” True it was, I love to eat and I loved to drink. (Most of the time I loved them both at the same time!)
I Got There With Excuses 🙁
Excuses, oh I had them down pat! My thyroid pretext or subterfuge is bad! I travel too much and you just can’t eat right when you travel! I have so many medical problems and I think it’s genetic! I put an explanation mark after each excuse because I was adamant as to the causes of my obesity. I refused to accept the blame for my size and if I could remember half of the things I said to rationalize my behavior I would be on a book signing tour right now. I would have long lines of large people waiting for me to sign my book, “It’s Not Your Fault. 1000 Excuses to Hide Behind”. Because the truth is, in almost every case, it is true. Dictionary.com defines excuses as “a pretext or subterfuge” such as “he uses his slow metabolism as an excuse for his lack of personal responsibility.”
Now for the Real Story…
I got to this state because I was unhappy and unconscious. I traveled 50 weeks a year and hid all of my realities behind a jovial disposition and never-ending laugh. So my typical day was wake up in the hotel, shower, dress and head to a big breakfast! This is not such a bad thing, because as we have all been told, breakfast is the most important meal of the day. I am not sure that always is the case in todays thinking, but it is certainly important. My issue was not that I ate breakfast, but what I ate, and that answer is everything! I told everyone that the four eggs, two meats, potatoes and pancakes was just a normal breakfast and I couldn’t start my day without it. Do you see a pattern here?
The day went on with Starbucks Lattes (not the skinny type either) and other indulgences until lunch and then it looked similar to breakfast, only the food types were changed to protect the innocent! This was followed by an afternoon Mocha, to which I would say was my “one” pleasure of the day!
The afternoons carried on and when the last customer was taken care of I raced to the bar! I was very dramatic about it also. I just had to wash this day away with a couple of drinks. Evidently I was not in tune with the Websters version of what a couple is. ‘Can you believe what a day it was? I need a drink!’ If it needed a reason, I had one. So there I was, off to the bar and then after sufficient lubrication, a typically late dinner. The dinner was not much different from the breakfast and lunch, but I did have the decency to always order a salad (which came right after the appetizers. The main course was mostly beef and it needed to be ordered by the pound. If it wasn’t beef it was more Mexican dishes than are allowed on a single plate. The only decent news about dinner was that I rarely ordered desert.
So following that extraordinary gastronomical series of events, I sauntered back to the hotel room where I promptly went right to sleep. Imagine that routine four or five days a week. But don’t worry, I had an excuse and I didn’t eat desert.
Where Does it all End?
That answer may be different for each individual, but for me, it ended when I realized that with a daily regimen of thirteen prescriptions and not having bought clothes off the rack for ten years, enough was enough. So I went to the doctor. He was very understanding and as he listened to my litany of excuses and subterfuge, he finally looked at me, waved his hands and said, “Okay I get it,” then said, “I have to see another patient, but instead of waiting here, run across the street to the shopping mall, look around for thirty minutes and then come back here. Once you get back tell me how many fat old men you saw.”
I just stared at him when he said, ” No wait, you don’t have to do that, I know the answer: NONE! THEY ARE ALL DEAD!” He then relayed that I am in this condition because of my own choices and I will stay in this condition until I am ready to take responsibility to change. So I did.
The Next Step…
I figured that I got myself into this but didn’t have a clue as to how to get out, so I sought help.
First steps were to learn about diet, so I started asking people smaller than me what they did and I got some really good advice, at least enough to start.
Second was to hit the gym. After a couple of trips, I was again faced with a real lack of understanding as to how to make an impact and do it in such a way as to sustain the effort. The last time I was serious about a gym was more than 25 years ago and I had sure changed in that time. So again, I looked outside myself to find a trainer that specialized in working with the over 50, full of themselves, excuse ridden, physically challenged types. I got lucky and found one.
What Else?
After working these areas with a great deal of success, I started to seek additional information about weight loss and better living without chemicals. After a year, I had lost 130 pounds, more than 25 inches off my neck, waist and chest and oh yes, all thirteen prescriptions. This is me below at 225 pounds.
Once I got to this size I found a ton of great things happening for me, but I thought, that there is still more to learn and I was hungry for this information (which is a great change from being hungry for a double cheese burger and extra-large fries). I found a tremendous resource in Dr Goldstein. I will post my conversations with him soon, but I want to leave you today with this thought:
You are the one person that has accountability for your actions and decisions when it comes to your help. You owe it to yourself to be competent about what you understand, questioning what you don’t and honest in your descriptions of your symptoms and your habits. Armed with this Standard Operating Procedure; you will be both responsible and effective in managing your health.
So have an in-depth conversation with yourself about your weight (or your inches, or your life style).
Today is the best time to start making a better you!
